When I was younger, I feel that I fell into this category that we are talking about this week; however, I feel that everyone can relate to this topic. The topic of how to hold oneself in “proper” self-regard and also to “get over oneself.”. I feel that all the philosophers share a common perspective for cultivating a meaningful friendship; however, it is essential first to know oneself to know someone else. The reason that I mention this is that philosopher Aristotle stated that “close friendship requires an individual to possess a greater range of qualities than just a fulsome capacity for reciprocal goodwill. It requires a proper sort of self-regard” (Vernon, 2010, p. 252). I feel that Aristotle knows in order to open up to fully loving someone else, which in return helps with how someone can get over themselves.
Therefore this is the same view that philosopher Socrates stated that “friends should not primarily hope for happiness in one another,.. but should seek together to live fuller, truer lives“(Vernon, 2010, p. 254). Socrates is saying that one can not be happy or move to a fuller life if they do not know themselves and to have a degree of utility friendship. As for the philosopher Plato, one should seize the opportunity to propel lovers in a relationship based upon knowing oneself, and both people will have to get over oneself (Vernon, 2010, p. 254). The philosopher Emerson stated to be delighted to one another, they exclaim each other, and they should desire to know each one better (Vernon, 2010, p. 255). It is proof that all the philosophers agree that the individual must know oneself to know someone else and to ensure that they are not getting over oneself in a friendship.
When looking at how friends could be living in a contradictory role, an example might be that one friend thinks that he is better than the rest of his friends. Something similar happened when I was a younger boy playing football in a small town. I was hanging out with neighborhood boys, and Tommy, a good friend, says that he was the best full-back ever. So, Mark, Scott, and I tried out for the team for all the positions that Tommy did. The other boys got hurt during the tryout and did not get a chance to play that year because I understood my body better. I had no intentions or wishes that they were to get hurt. I feel that in younger friendships, one needs to understand themselves. Children will always make comments that they are the greatest player in the world, and this even applies to friendship.
I agree that in friendship, one should have a more extensive love of life itself. This has to happen “so that the individual is capable of pursuing interests that are not their own” (Vernon, 2010, p. 252). As the individual experiences different things in life, their interests in old things start to change to new, improved interests. It has to happen as we grow up from babies, teenagers, to adults. As time goes on, an individual grows and moves in and out of friendships. Aristotle’s categorization of friendship is affected everyone at some point in their life. It could be from the “utility friendships found at work, and pleasure friendships such as those shared by people who enjoy doing something together” (Vernon, 2010, p. 251). All of these are important in order to share activity and have external relations in one’s life. It is essential in order for us to grow and find a friendship that is meaningful, rewarding, and provides purpose to one’s life.
Vernon, Mark. (2010) The Meaning of Friendship. New York, NY: Palgrave Macmillan
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